Wow! When I Trace My Hand It Does Look Like a Turkey!

I like Thanksgiving, it’s a fun day. But November is really just a boring intermission between two awesome holidays! I don’t have a lot of inspiration when it comes to Thanksgiving, so I probably won’t do too many posts during this period. But stay tuned for a massive onslaught of Christmas stuff once the season officially starts!

 

 Oh and by the way, turkeys are are ugly, hideous beasts…
Hand Turkey

Wow! My hand really does look like a turkey when I trace it!

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Days of Halloween, Day whatever… Free Halloween eBook Available This Week!

In the tradition of wasting my time by writing and Illustrating holiday themed books I have just completed a Halloween Book! All Hallows Curse is a short tale about a kid who encounters some frightening spooks while Trick or Treating. I am hoping to have the book available for download tomorrow or the next day on amazon and it will be free to download for the first 5 days. I will make an official announcement once the title is available. Until then here is an image of the cover.

 

All Hallows Curse!

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31 Days of Halloween, Day 10: The Worms Crawl In

When I was a little kid I loved this poem/song, and I forgot it existed until today when I randomly thought about it. I am am excited to tell it to Ian and I encourage any other terrible parents to share it with their kids!

THE HEARSE SONG

by Anonymous

“Don’t ever laugh as the hearse goes by,
Or you will be the next to die.
They wrap you up in a big white sheet
From your head down to your feet.
They put you in a big black box
And cover you up with dirt and rocks.
All goes well for about a week,
Then your coffin begins to leak.
The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out,
The worms play pinochle in your snout,
They eat your eyes, they eat your nose,
They eat the jelly between your toes.
A big green worm with rolling eyes
Crawls in your stomach and out your eyes.
Your stomach turns a slimy green,
And pus pours out like whipping cream.
You’ll spread it on a slice of bread,
And this is what you eat when you are dead.”

worms

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31 Days of Halloween Day 2: Little Orphan Annie

Every Halloween it is tradition in my family to read John Whitcomb Riley’s poem “Little Orphan Annie” the visuals always terrified me when I was a little kid. I adapted it a bit for easier reading but it still maintains it’s basic style. I will always remember my Grandpa Brimley gathering us together in his living room by the fire and reading Little Orphan Annie as we sat in our costumes frozen with fear but happy.

by John Whitcomb Riley

by John Whitcomb Riley, Illustrated by Nicholas Pfeifer

 

 

 

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Obama’s CONFLICT of Interest

Nobel Peace Prize Recipient Barack Obama uses one of his Peace Missiles to resolve yet another international conflict.

Obama's Conflict of Interest

 

 

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Kodos 2012!

We are merely exchanging long protein strings. If you can think of a simpler way, I'd like to hear it.

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The Not So Great Pumpkin

A quick little comic for your pleasure:

Charlie Brown Fights Back A $#@% Rock?! Are You Freaking Kidding Me?!

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA!

LIVING IN THE USA

^

Click Here

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Maroonbeard, St. Picklas Merch!

St. Picklas, Maroonbeard, and radioactive themed junk now available for purchase! Be the first to have a friend ask what in the crap St. Picklas is when you wear his face on your shirt!

http://www.cafepress.com/maroonbeardsplunder?aid=66109099

 

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