Your own printable Krampus card!!!
Just as Santa differs in different regions so do his sidekicks. Krampus is basically a possessed, Satanic version of Black Peter and Rupert the Farm-hand. Krampus started as pre-Christian German figure and his legend spread to other alpine countries. Eventually he morphed into the guys we talked about before (Black Peter, Knecht Ruprecht) in some regions as he became incorporated into Christmas folklore. But he is still very much a part of the Christmas tradition in many places.
There are many variations of Krampus, but his basic form is that of a devilish, goat-like, beast. Long horns, cloven feet and covered with fur of varying colors.
Krampus is notoriously drunk and is said to reek of Schnapps and he likes to carry around a bundle of sticks to whip children with, and a tub or sack on his back so that he can more easily haul children off to be drowned, eaten or dragged to hell… I’m Not sure why this tradition never caught on in America.
Another Krampus-related tradition is to send out Krampus cards around the holidays. These cards usually depict Krampus shoving kids into baskets, pursuing large-breasted women or other strange sexual situations. Krampus is a real creep.
We already covered Black Peter but there are other guys that like to hang around with Santa to psychologically torment and abuse naughty children…
Ruprecht is another traditional German character. Roughly translated as Rupert the farm-hand. Rupert is basically Bizarro Santa; similar clothes but brown instead of red, long beard but it’s black instead of white, and he carries around a bag of ashes rather than toys. He gives some kids treats if they can prove to him that they are able to pray. But, if the kids are little heathens he beats them with his bag of ashes. He give bad kids crappy, useless gifts like coal, sticks and stones. So basically Santa has Rupert do all of his dirty work so he can bask in the glory of being the good guy. Apparently, Rupert can’t get a US Visa because Santa has to show his true colors and give out all the coal himself around these parts, and he seems to be pretty lax, that’s probably why kids are such spoiled brats here. We need more kids to be beaten with a bag of ashes…
Also, The Simpson’s dog is named Knecht Ruprecht in Germany rather than Santa’s little helper.
For more highly informative Christmas folklore follow the links!!!
Posted in Art, Christmas, Pop Culture and tagged Art, ArtX ChristmasX DrawingsX FolkloreX FunnyX HumorX Knecht RuprechtX KrampusX krampuskartenX krampusnachtX legendsX traditions, Christmas, Drawings, Folklore, Funny, Humor, Pop Culture, Spooky, Strange, Weird by maroonbeard with no comments yet.
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Posted in Art, Pop Culture and tagged Art, Disney, Disneyland, Drawings, Funny, Humor, Mad hatter, Mickey Mouse, Political Cartoons, Pop Culture, Rad, Rat Fink, Spooky, Tea Cup Ride, Weird by maroonbeard with no comments yet.
BE SURE TO CARVE YOUR PUMPKINS BEFORE THEY HATCH.
Posted in Art, Halloween, Pop Culture and tagged Art, Drawings, Ed Big Daddy Roth, Folklore, Funny, Halloween, Halloween Pumpkon Creature, Jack O Lantern, Rat Fink, Scary, Spooky, Strange, Weird, Zombies by maroonbeard with no comments yet.
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Posted in Art, Halloween and tagged Art, Halloween, Scary, Spooky, Strange by maroonbeard with no comments yet.
Looking deeper into the history of the un-dead, maroonbeard.com stumbled upon an ancient Etruscan Zombie Mural. This find once again reveals the similarities we share even with the oldest civilization.
Make sure to check out our previous Zombie Mural from the Persian Empire here.
Posted in Art, Pop Culture and tagged Art, Drawings, Etruscans, Folklore, Funny, Halloween, Humor, Pop Culture, Spooky, Weird, Zombies by maroonbeard with no comments yet.
There have been a lot of theories about what happened to Malaysian Air Flight MH370, but we now have undeniable proof of a diabolical plot…
Posted in Art and tagged America, Art, Ayatola, Drawings, Funny, Iran, Political Cartoons, Politics, Scary, Skeletor, Skull Rock, Spooky, Strange, Weird by maroonbeard with 2 comments.
Tonight is the night, when moldy tombs tremble and quake.
Children roam free is search of soul cakes.
Death is so close, you can feel his stale breath,
as he draws nearer and pants at your neck.
If you feel a draft in your room as you’re trying to sleep,
clutch your hands tight and cover your feet.
Cold caresses from a long expired breeze,
Some lonely, cold souls just want a mortal to squeeze.
Posted in Art, Halloween and tagged Art, Halloween, Humor, Scary, Skeleton, Spooky by maroonbeard with no comments yet.
Thanks for all the downloads, I had almost 90 downloads on the first day! There is still plenty of time to download and share “All Hallows’ Curse” with your friends. It is 100% free, but after Saturday it will be $1.99. If you did download it, what did you think? FEEDBACK IS WELCOME, take a minute to write a review if you can. Thanks everybody and I hope you like my weird little book…
For those curious here’s a sample…
Posted in Uncategorized and tagged Art, Children's Books, Halloween, Humor, Sample, Scary, Spooky, Strange, Trick or Treat, Uncategorized by maroonbeard with no comments yet.
I have successfully uploaded my new Halloween book to amazon and it is FREE TO DOWNLOAD FOR THE NEXT FIVE DAYS! Please follow the link to download the book, if you like it please give me a good review. And if you don’t like it… DON’T READ IT!
AND PLEASE SHARE THE LINK WITH YOUR FRIENDS, THE MORE DOWNLOADS I GET THE HIGHER THE RANKING ON AMAZON…
Posted in Art, Halloween and tagged All Hallows' Curse, Art, Books, Children's Books, eBook, Halloween, Humor, Scary, Spooky, Strange, Zombies by maroonbeard with no comments yet.